Being a single mom is something pretty new to me. It’s something that I never expected to be, but surprisingly, something I find that I am enjoying quite a bit! Without a doubt, there are a lot of challenges. There are certain well known obstacles that are, for lack of a better word, stereotypical of the role of a single mom—such as tighter finances, double the work, less free time, lack of grown-up companionship, and the ugly stigma sometimes associated with it.
But none of these issues were surprises to me, so I was mentally prepared. In hindsight, I think I expected much worse. What did surprise me? Well, quite frankly, just how many positives changes and moments came along with the gig. I’m not saying “Hey everyone! Go try this!” Just that what once felt like a terrifying and depressing prospect has turned out to be filled with many joys!
I am thinking of writing a short series of posts chronicling some experiences along my journey to single mom-dom. But I thought it might be fun to preface that with a quick top 10 list of the things that ROCK about being a single mom (thus far). So here goes:
10. Sharing the bed and good night cuddles: My daughter sleeps in my bed with me. Spare me the lecture. I love every second of it and wouldn’t change a thing. I truly believe that it eased the transition into single mom-dom for both of us to be able to put on our jammies at night, climb in to bed together, and fall asleep in a warm embrace. Sure, sometimes I wake up with a skinny little leg on my throat, but it’s a small price to pay. I’m a big fan of the “they won’t be this small forever” school of thought, so I savor every moment.
9. Eating pizza and ice cream for dinner, no judgment: We don’t do this every night, but it’s kinda nice not to have to play house wife after a long day at the office. I won’t judge her if she eats pizza again, and she won’t judge me if I order it. It’s an unspoken deal.
8. Less laundry to fold: Which means more time for ice cream before bed.
7. Way more Spontaneity: With only two schedules to coordinate, picking up and going to Disney on a whim has become one of our favorite things to do on weekends.
6. Binging on Gilmore Girls together while painting each others nails on a Sunday afternoon. Nuff said.
5. Guilt free shopping trips: Yep. I bought her another toy. No, she didn’t need it. And why yes, those are 3 boxes of new shoes for me.
4. Staying up way too late watching TV: Now and again, an old classic like Adventures in Babysitting will come on, and well, you just have to bend the bed time rules!
3. Silly girly outfits: Because why not?
2. Family time. With only one extended family in the picture (mine), that means we both get to spend more time with the people who love us unconditionally and have been a part of both of our lives for ever.
1. Every spare second belongs to her: I work long hours at a tough job. I work hard, and I like it. But from the moment I walk through that door at the end of the day, every second is for her and her only. And that’s okay, because no one else expects anything of me. So I can focus on her, guilt free. This has actually increased the quality of my work, because I’m not carrying as much of the “working mom guilt” as I once did. I know that when I am with her, we are getting in some good quality time and making amazing memories together. In short, there is more of me to give to things that make me happy. And there ain’t nothing wrong with that.